proofreading....

Discuss any English grammar item not covered in one of the other forums: prepositions, articles, pronouns, etc.

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HwangYoungDong
Posts: 8
Joined: Mon Mar 13, 2006 3:15 pm

proofreading....

Post by HwangYoungDong » Mon Apr 10, 2006 4:53 pm

:cry: Prepositions, articles, pronouns are my weakness. Maybe, this journal will have my weakness. Please, help me. :D


If I get a high paying job, I will buy beautiful cars. For example, Ferrari, Rolls-royce, Benz, BMW. And I will hire my driver. And then, I will buy many house. Especially, I will buy expensive and popular houses of in Pangeo and Kangnam. So I will a real estate rich. And then, I will build my house, a teahouse and a motel in Yangpeang. I wish I live with my parents together clean water and clean air. Finally, I want to world tour. First, I will go the head office of Canon camera in Japan. Because, I am a mania of Canon camera. Actually, I have a ixus 55 model of Canon. Second is America crossing the Pacific Ocean. If I go America, I will go the head office of Microsoft, Blizzard and Intel. Going Microsoft, I will handshake with Bill gates. Next, I will ride a transcontinental railroad. Finally, I will go the Grand Canyon and the Niagara Falls. Next, It is the Canada. I will enjoy skying everyday before die. And I will go Victoria I. Really finally, I will go British crossing the Atlantic Ocean. In the British, I will meet Korean Premiere leaguer Park and Lee. And, I will drink famous Whiskeys in the Scotland. Next, I will tour the Europe with TGV. If all things come true to me, my feeling must fly in the sky.
If you get a high paying job,~~~ :D

wassana
Posts: 27
Joined: Mon Dec 19, 2005 8:24 pm

Hwang Young Dong

Post by wassana » Mon Apr 10, 2006 9:25 pm

Hi there,
I am also an English learner, and struggling with English writing as well. Hope, you don't mind my suggestions here. One thing I remember from school is never starting the sentence with "And". You might want to consider that. I find conditional statements can be tricky. I'm not sure if your statements are all real situations. Using all present tenses suggest that these are real situations. ( However, shaking hands with Bill Gate, ummmm.....no offends, I'm not so sure about that.) One more thing, what kind of job you are talking about here, it has to be very...very high paying for you to do it all. In any case that your statements might be unreal situations, then you need to change some forms of your statements.

Hope, this helps.

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